Honeymoon Q & A: Who Pays for the Honeymoon?
- My son is getting married in 2 months and tonight told me the
honeymoon would cost $10,000. He insists that the groom's parents pay for
this traditionally. I have never heard of this.
My husband and I cannot possibly deal with this at this late date, and feel that even if this is true, the considerate thing to do would have been to let us know a year ago, 6 months ago, not 2 months from the wedding.
Is the honeymoon in fact the groom's parents' responsibility?
- I thought the couple saved for their honeymoon and went somewhere they could afford. I don't want this to ruin what should be a happy time for the entire family.
Answer:
In this day and age there is no set rule on who pays for the honeymoon. However, while the bride is deeply involved in the wedding planning, the groom often takes the responsibility to plan -- but not necessarily pay for -- the honeymoon (with the bride's input, of course).
Often a couple will fund the honeymoon themselves, especially when parents pick up the tab for the wedding. A couple who can't afford an expensive honeymoon can delay their getaway, take a shorter one than planned, drive instead of fly, or visit a place in the off season to save money.
Another way to deal with the expense of a honeymoon is by having the couple register for travel gifts at a Honeymoon Bridal Registry.
Comments
Everything I’ve read says that the groom and his family are responsible for the honeymoon, not to mention everything for the groom and the flowers.
Sounds to me like you want someone to agree with you on getting out of paying for your responsibility. If the bride’s family is footing a massive bill, the least the groom’s family can do is put up for the honeymoon.
That the bride’s family pays for the wedding and the groom and his family pick up the tab for the honeymoon reflect the old rules, when couples married at a younger age. Families can still agree to abide by those terms, but there’s a lot more flexibility now, especially since lots of couples now foot the bill for their own wedding and don’t depend on parents.
A professional couple has lived together for over a year, and own their own home. The bride is a close relative. The bride’s father and stepmother have given a gift of $10,000 for the wedding (never expecting to be completely excluded from any planning. Their friends are not allowed to be invited. No children are allowed (outside morning wedding). “No gifts please, but we are accepting donations toward our honeymoon.” Honeymoon about 1-1/2 hours away. Staying at the ranch of a friend for a week. Would you give money? I’m from the old school and say, “No.” Would you just send a congratulatory card?
Sounds like they’ve handed you a lot of rules. And the one shilling for honeymoon donations is tacky. But the rule I stick by is, if you go to the wedding, you give a gift.
If you don’t want to buy help to fund their low-cost honeymoon, make a donation in their names to a charity they support and include the info in the card you send.
Keep in mind that couples do remember if they’ve been stiffed by guests, and you don’t want things to get off on the wrong foot.
Good luck.
That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve heard! In this day & age, there is no such thing as the bride or groom’s parents having to pay for any part of the wedding. If they wish to do so, then great but if not, them it should be the sole responsibility of the couple who decided that they want an elaborate honeymoon which they cannot afford!
If the families are big then it is fair to have a contribution from both sides – but not for the honeymoon.
Traditionally speaking the brides family picks up the bill for the wedding and the grooms family the beverages. The Couple then pays for the honeymoon.
This day and age everything is changing but there is NO way that traditionally the grooms parents pay for the honeymoon.
As I do book honeymoons I know that some parents make a contribution but most people these days set up a honeymoon registry like the one mentioned above.
Clare from African Honeymoons
Your son is being cheap and rude to both
his father and mother.Just think what next
he will want you both to for him.
Groom wake up and smell the roses